Prayers for Cody and Norah

For those who follow our story and believe in prayer, I have two requests for you.

One is a little boy named Cody who is dying of cancer. I have been following his dad's blog for a while, and I just listed it over in the blogs I'm following. Do not read this if you're looking for happily ever after stories, because the situation no parent should ever have to face is unfolding for this family. Cody has deteriorated so much recently that they are now in what they call memory-making mode. They just returned from a week at the beach, and before they left, Mickey had to sign the DNR paperwork at the hospital Cody is normally treated at so that the paperwork could be filed at the nearest hospital to where they were staying during their trip. Now they're back, and Cody went straight from the airport to the hospital and is not doing well. I think they are at the point where the prayers are needed for strength for the family to get through what is ahead and comfort once that part is over--miraculous healing does not seem to be part of God's plan for this youngster. Please pray for them as they face the deterioration and loss of their son. The ending of Mickey's post titled "80 to 30" just tore my heart out.

On a happier note, Glenn and Lori are leaving this week to go get Norah. I blogged about them earlier in January--this is the couple who is adopting a deaf Chinese girl with a heart problem. They have come close to rounding up what they need to make the trip. They will probably need to get a loan to cover the remaining amount, but they have managed between saving themselves and donations from very generous people to put together all but $2000 of the $10k they needed to make this happen. (Any last minute donations would, I'm sure, be gratefully appreciated!) I'm looking forward to following their blog while they're over in China, and I can't wait until Norah has a home and family of her very own. Their blog is also listed in the blogroll on the left.

Please keep both of these families in your prayers, one going through unutterable sadness and the other about to experience profound joy.

I hear you knocking....

So today Charlie and I are sitting at the table, reading a story. More accurately, he's reading to me. We do this as a supplement to whatever they're teaching him in school, because he just soaks up new vocabulary words from doing this. The real challenge is not whether he can identify all the words in the sentence, but whether he understands the sentence or paragraph once he has signed it.

So one sentence in today's story used the word "knock." I have an aversion to just giving him the sign for a word he doesn't know. I prefer to have him try to figure it out, whether through telling a story using the word, or pantomiming the concept. So, I gave him the situation of arriving at a friend's house to find the door closed. You want to get in. What do you do?

"Open the door and walk in."

Okay, let's re-think this....the door is locked. How do you get someone to unlock it and let you in?

"I take out my cell phone and text my friend, saying, 'Dude, open the door.'"

I think this is one time I'm justified in just giving him the sign for the word. Duh--Charlie's friends are all deaf. Why bother knocking???

Charley wanna Harley??

Tonight Charlie and I went to the Mid-Atlantic Motorcycle Show at Timonium. Just for yucks and giggles, neither of us could afford to buy anything.

Charlie has decided he's going to learn to ride a motorcycle. I guess that's my bad influence rubbing off on him.

But which one? There were so many to choose from. Maybe this one?

Nah, let's try this one!

Oh, wait...here's the perfect one!


Seriously, they had some pretty weird bikes there. It was fun wandering around and seeing just how much someone could mess up a perfectly simple machine.

Me, I'll stick with my plain little old Honda Rebel! Maybe when Charlie's old enough, I'll be ready to move up and he can buy it from me.

No More Mama Einstein!

Every once in a while, you just have to make a nuisance of yourself.

I have now been working with Baby Einstein (aka Charlie) for two weeks from algebra books borrowed from the library. It crossed my feeble mind that perhaps I should try to get a copy of the algebra textbook they use at school so I know I'm covering the same stuff they do and in the same order. So in addition to the e-mail notes I have been sending his math teacher every couple of days to keep him informed of what Charlie has learned, I also sent him a note asking for the textbook and teacher's guide, explaining that I needed them to be sure I taught him the entire semester's worth of algebra so that he would be able to start the next level in the fall.

All this time, he's been passing my notes on to the vice-principal. Apparently my request for the textbook was the last straw, since I had clearly articulated in that note what our goal was at this point. Today I get a note from him stating that the VP had figured out a way to get Charlie into a pre-algebra class. He starts tomorrow. Furthermore, his current math teacher will continue to work with him after school periodically to ensure that he doesn't miss any of the mathematical principles he would be getting from the general math class.

Squeaky wheel? I think maybe it bothered them that he was in essence being home-schooled by an unskilled teacher who admitted to them that she hated math. Successfully. After all, if he's doing this well under MY tutelage, how well could he do under theirs? They're the experts, after all, in both algebra and sign!

I have (gratefully) agreed to return the library's algebra books and cease and desist from teaching him at home so that he paces with the class.

I seem to have won this one without resorting to whining, begging, or complaining loudly (which does no good at a deaf school, anyway). All I had to do was spend a couple of weeks proving to them what he was capable of. They can't stand the thought of a child not performing to his potential, especially once he's demonstrated the ability. I like this school's flexibility and willingness to work with the kids individually where necessary. They've done this concerning his English lessons, too, because in that area he is naturally behind his peers and they're doing a lot of extra work with him to try to get him up to grade level by the time he finishes high school. (He will have a 5-year high school program.) But they're not going to let that hold him back in other areas, and now they're starting to get a taste of what I've known all along--he has the potential for brilliance if given the chance.

Now go get 'em, Charlie!

Yes, the picture really is Pauline Koch, Einstein's mother. I don't see much resemblance, except that we both had really bright kids.

Baby Einstein

This Baby Einstein I've adopted is starting to irritate me. I simply can't abide having someone smarter than I in the house.

Charlie came home one day last week saying something about being moved to a different math class on Jan 20 (semester change), a lower class. When I had looked at his grade sheet a couple of weeks earlier, he had all A's and B's in math with a D in just one module, and he was able to show me what module was and that he now understood it, so I wasn't concerned about that.

But moving to a lower math class? Time to talk to the teacher and find out what's going on.

It seems that they were actually trying to move Charlie ahead at one point. His teacher felt, and another teacher who subbed for his classes for a while agreed, that Charlie was so strong in math he needed to move up to an algebra class next semester, so they were trying to figure out how to re-work his schedule to get him into an algebra class. Unfortunately, it doesn't work out, since each of his classes next semester is mandatory and is only offered by one teacher at one specific time. So they are planning to keep him in his regular math class (hence the "lower" sign he used) instead of moving him up.

Thing is, Charlie really wants to learn algebra. And before my brain was fully engaged and cognizant of what I was about to say, I told him the only other option I could see was to get an algebra textbook from the public library and for me to teach him that at home on the weekends. He jumped up and said, "Let's go!"

Ahem....I should probably mention that I grew up terrified of math. One of the reasons I delayed college is that I was afraid of math. Once I got started, I actually got A's, but I had to put in a LOT of hard work to do it, and I'm still not comfortable saying that I'm good at math. So the realization that Charlie's first algebra skills were going to depend on me not only remembering all of that crap but actually being able to explain it IN SIGN LANGUAGE struck terror in my heart all over again.

Unfortunately, we got to the library 5 minutes before they closed, so there was plenty of time to get a librarian to show us where the algebra books were and choose one or two. No backing out of this one.

We came home, and Charlie glanced through the books while I was preparing dinner. I kept hoping maybe he would look at it, decide it looks too hard, and quietly set it aside. Noooooo, not ChinaBoy. As soon as dinner was over, I curled up in my easy chair with my laptop to answer some e-mail, and there he is at my shoulder, signing "Help me." Help you what? "Algebra." He wants his first lesson RIGHT NOW.

So we sat down and cracked the book. Introductory stuff. Good--I can remember this part, I'm still with the program. Explaining it sometimes was a bit of a challenge, but we got through the first few topics. It's very easy with Charlie to tell when he truly understands something--you can see the lightbulb going on.

That was Friday night.

On Saturday, I worked and then ran some errands, and when I got home, I sat down with the laptop. Sure enough, within 5 minutes, he's at my elbow. "Help me, algebra."

So we hit the books again.

After only two lessons, he now understands (basics, mind you) prime numbers, factoring, exponents, variables, constants, commutative law, and order of operations; he is solving (simple) algebraic exponential expressions if given values for x and y; he understands area and perimeter of basic geometric shapes and can solve for those values with an algebraic expression; and he understands that the angles of a triangle must equal 180 degrees and how to solve for a missing side of a right triangle.

Okay, maybe not an Einstein (yet), but he is really soaking this stuff up at warp speed, and trying to stay one step ahead of him is starting to get on my last freakin' nerve!

Oh, no...I'm sitting here blogging from my easy chair with my laptop in my lap.

And I hear him coming down the stairs....

Discretionary Funds

Someday when my adoption debts are all paid off (hah!!) and I again have that wonderful item euphemistically known as a discretionary fund, there are a few things I intend to do that serve no practical purpose whatsoever--just because I want to. (Those of you who know me well are gasping in shock and wondering what on earth has come over me, I know!)

One of them is buy a forensic photo regression of Charlie. I would like to make a really nice lifebook for him as a gift if/when he marries, but I have no baby pictures of him. In fact, the earliest pictures I have of him (and very few of those) are from the age of about 12. The orphanage never bothered to take baby or young child pictures of him because they never believed he would be adopted. They didn't really start taking a lot of pictures until the summer before he was adopted, when they found out someone was interested in him. But you've heard of how they can "age" a missing child photograph to show what the child can look like today after being missing for several years? Guess what? They can do it BACKWARDS as well! I caught a link for a company that does both progressions and regressions on photographs, and I'm so excited at the thought of having baby pictures of Charlie that I'm simply beside myself!! You HAVE to check out this link and look at the picture of what Elvis would look like today. This is really cool--take a look at some of the regressions they've done. http://www.phojoe.com/forensic_compositing.html

Another thing would be to start a search for his birth parents. I asked Charlie if he would someday want to know who his birthparents were if that information could be found, and he said yes. That's one of the reasons I follow Brian Stuy's blog (see Research-China.org in the blog list). He's the recognized expert in that field. I have no idea what it costs to mount a search--I have seen how extensively he works on a project from some of the descriptions, and I imagine it's a pretty penny, so it certainly isn't anything I could justify just yet. But someday, when Charlie turns out to be the next John Yeh, (see http://www.gazette.net/stories/12192008/businew173336_32472.shtml), it would be neat to at least reach out and let his birth parents know he turned out okay.

I'm sure I'll find more things to add to the discretionary funds list, but I think these two will be priorities!

New Year, New 'Tude

I'm not much on the resolution thing, never been able to keep one in my life, but I really am going to try to be more optimistic and hopeful this year.

It's been hard this past year, being optimistic, when you're struggling to pay the mortgage, and gas is $4 per gallon, and the utility company raises the rates 72%, the grocery bill skyrockets, and your Chinese kid thinks his favorite things like pomegranates and tomatoes (which now cost $5 each at the grocery store) grow on trees or bushes or something. (Wanna make Charlie's day??? Send him a Harry and David's box of tomatoes or pomegranates!)

But I'm really going to do a better job of it this year.

Gonna spend more time with my kids (when I can get them to spend time with me--I have to remember they have friends and lives separate from mine). Making progress on this one already, since Charlie is working on learning the driver's handbook with me, and has been demanding time from me every day to work on the next sections. Rick is a harder nut to crack, but I'll figure something out. It usually has to involve food.

Gonna spend more time with my parents (when I can catch them at home--for retired people, they sure are gone a lot!). They almost moved last year, and it scared me into realizing how much time with them I'd lose, so I'm going to try and get it all in now, because I know they are still planning on moving, it's just a matter of when.

Gonna get my house in order. The clutter is stressing me out, so my local Freecycle group is gonna have a reason to really love me now. Planning to scan all my files to CD and ditch the filing folders except for the most important originals, get rid of the desktop computer setup since I do everything on the laptop, hopefully get the money together to get the basement leak fixed and maybe even get the house on the market at some point if the economy recovers well enough to sell. Lots of plans in this regard, one small project at a time.

Gonna get more organized. Okay, I'm NOT going back to the OCD days when I alphabetized the cans of vegetables in the pantry (yes, really!), but I will admit the pendulum has swung too far in the other direction, and I'm losing my grip. Can't remember important events and assignments, and my oldest is starting to call me senile. This just has to stop. I forget how old I am, but it's too young to be senile.

Gonna be healthier. Notice I'm not using the word weight. I refuse to use the word diet. No numbers. But before I went to China, I was doing a good job of eating many raw foods and eating many small meals during the day instead of the traditional Big Three, and I felt good and was never hungry. That regimen got totally screwed up during those three weeks in China, and I've never quite gotten back to it. This ties back in with getting more organized, because it takes planning to have that kind and that much food with you throughout the day (and in my case, evenings at class too), but I'm going there. Also planning to resume my lunchtime walk around the campus I work on, which only took about 20 minutes, but fell by the wayside once I started needing lunch breaks to study for the killer classes I had. Might actually make a deal with myself to use the exercise bike in the basement on days that I skip the walking. No numbers, no end point, no pressure, just going to get healthier. It's easier to be optimistic when you feel healthy.

Okay, I know those things sound a lot like resolutions, but they're not, not really. They're just lifestyle changes that I think will make me happier and help me have a better attitude.

If anyone else wants to share a few resolutions, er, I mean lifestyle changes, hit the comments link. We'd love to hear yours and maybe adopt them, too.

Happy New Year, everybody!